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Posted by: Dhammañāṇa
« on: January 23, 2024, 10:36:58 PM »Appearing one morning, total wet from sweat, after walk, he just desired to bow down, eat his alms food and then told that he will go into the forest... No way to talk anything to him, remembering many of his supporter would be more than pleased to see him well, after spending years in a hot tent... "I just like to cure my boil..." he said, and went on.
At the fest of giving the Hall , where Atma took the seldom possibility to ordain, it happened that lay people saw Bhante on the street, walking back to his favored monastery.
Upasika, Upasaka rushed to meet him and encouraged him to use the possibility as well.
Finally come up, resting at the Deva kuti, Atma, already ordained, met him and spoke clear with Bhante. He refused to take the chance first, because he thought that his hygienic issue boils make him not possible to ordain (he does not know what boils really are). Making him clear that there is no hindrance, he then took the chance and asked for becoming ordained and finally got.
The next three, four days, he was asked to stay a week to get health, which he agreed, went well. Hygienic, daily treatment and cleaning the abscesses, he soon was well, fit and health.
Then he also abound his outworen robe, main reason for his illness, and took on a new in ways of vinaya.
Next morning he stood at Atmas bed at four o'clock, folding hands and telling "I go now", having taken again the old robe he gave away silently from the store again.
Asked of what's his problem, he told "I don't trust you". Asked for a sample, of way proper to do not trust, he told: "See, for example, this robe here (pointing on the 'stolen' old robe he abounded hours ago). It's not special, but I made it my self... I go now..." and before able to speak further, he run like hunted into the dark night, abounding all his promises he made to others, preceptor, new Nissaya at Wat Ark Yum...
Atma seriously worry about his status tried to send his realky own robe to him via Nyom, Nyom, and got then heard that Bhante told Upasika that he is A Samanera, already arrived 2 days lager (maybe flying...).
So actually the third, forth, time directly perceived, and many times by hear saying, it's certain clear that Bhante seems to have a heavy mental problem or grave confusion, nobody could solve.
Atma can not remember that having dreamed anything of some reasonable for many years, if even anything, but yesterday a pointless journey to try to get the confused Marcel back on stage, in a very clear dreaming, was without any success.
Not sure, since listening to nobody seemingly, spending just there where nobody tells him anything, if a visit by his brother might help.
There where he now is, is no more easy way to progress any further and a lot of additional dangers, like doing things as Bhikkhu that cause defeat, and so on, are very near.
After long time, again and again trying to keep him on track and to understand that this religion is not to go a way of harming oneself, it seems to be time to let go of such efforts.
May Bhante soon come to mind and be able to follow the way he desired to go, for an and of all confusions.